Friday, April 28, 2006

Sometimes when I'm working, I get sidetracked

For instance, today, I was looking for relationship books so I could get story ideas. As I trolled publishers' sites, I came across one that had a book on mini-meditations. I've done enough "100 Ways To..." stories to know that mini-ANYTHINGS can come in handy.

Then again, is this mini-meditation something that I really WANT to come in handy?

Going to the Toilet

It’s quite relaxing to go to the toilet. At least one sphincter has to relax completely or it’s not worth going there at all. When you let one muscle go, others can relax in sympathy. Furthermore, the toilet may be the only place where no one will disturb you. You can always grab a few extra seconds there and no one will complain.

The Buddha was the first person to recommend urinating as a meditation object. This is a practice that is at least 2,500 years old. A psychologist friend reminded me of this recently. He says he goes to the toilet in the five minutes between clients, and lets everything go along with the urine. He gets so relaxed in those few seconds he says he can barely hold his balance.

In Western literature, it is surprising how often the toiled is regarded as a suitable place for deep thought. You sit down and settle into your body. You relax and wait, and randomly survey the state of the nation. Not surprisingly, bright ideas can arise and you feel relaxed for minutes afterwards. An excellent meditation!

Going to the toilet

* As you approach the toilet, sigh in anticipation.
* Get out of your head and into your body. Feel the pressure in your bladder.
* As you urinate, close your eyes and sigh deeply.
* Feel all the muscles of your body loosening in sympathy.
* Don’t hurry to finish. No one will disturb you.
* After the last drop, stay motionless for a few seconds more. Enjoy that space with nothing to do.
* Walk away with a smile on your face."

Source: Flip the Switch, by Eric Harrison

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Bad Spelling Also Fills Me With Fury

This is pulled from an actual job listing on MediaBistro:

"Pay is commiserate with this kind of responsibility and opportunity."

Yes, I'm sure it is. I'm ... sure it is.

Saturday, April 22, 2006

Everyone is more successful than me. I. Whatever.

Yesterday I went to take a look at one of those freelance-workspace thingees, where you rent a cubicle and force yourself to be in the company of other writers. The guy who ran it not only freelanced for a really good paper, not only had book contracts, not only had it together enough to run the workspace, but had also spent 5 months restoring the place himself, clearing the walls all the way down to the exposed brick and the floors down to the hardwood... floor.

Not only that, he told me a lot of people pay for the space and only use it, like, every other month.

Not only that, when I visited another place a week ago, the impresario there said everyone was working full-time on FICTION.

Who are these people? Where do they get their money? They work all day on novels? They never have to take a gig writing cell-phone horoscopes just to pay off their credit cards? They can work on fiction with that kind of concentration, without sitting back and yelling at the ceiling? (There was a hush in both places that made intensive care units seem boisterous.)

I'm the worst freelancer EVER.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Guess What Cures My Procrastination?

An hourly rate. More when I milk this cash cow dry.